If you didn't laugh, you'd just go insane
Oct. 27th, 2009 10:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_goren_showYou've all seen us, but you never see us. We are the people who sit at desks and watch monitors and endure being called rent-a-cops and other less flattering names. Yes, some of our number are no more than two feet and a heartbeat but any job can say that about their people. You just see us on our asses in a chair or wandering apparently aimlessly through doors on patrols. Sometimes we even piss you off when we deny you access to places you feel entitled to be or we question your presence in these areas. We are security professionals and you pay us peanuts to endure things you would never take on as your responsibility or don't care about and then sneer at us both behind our backs and to our faces, expecting us to take the shit you hand us with a smile and dig in... and god love us, because some of us do since we genuinely love our jobs and care about what we do.
This is the story of what a security professional goes through on a bad day.
Okay, let's hit a long story sideways on with the beginning - as a note, I've modified this story from the conversation I had with a friend about my day. I woke up at the time I ought to have been arriving at work, which is never a good way to start a day. I was dressing before I was awake and calling work that I was going to be late. I should have stayed in bed as we will see but I arrived at work only 15 minutes late. Life is not great because I hate being late (it's disrespectful to your co-workers in security since they then have to stay late for briefing) but the night guy and I joked a bit and all was good. He briefs me and the elevators in Tower Two are both down. We have two elevators for each tower, and only one of each goes to the ground floor which is the ambulance entrance in a luxury condo building that has 80+ units that are 75% owned seniors. Having both elevators down is a nightmare because if anyone has a medical emergency, we are pooched before we start because we can't get the ambulance to them quickly. He had called the management company emergency number and the elevator company had arrived at 3 am but had to leave at 5 am for an entrapment in another building.
So there I am, stuck with what is turning out to be a hell day and it's only 7:15 am. The only way out of Tower Two is down the stairs, ten floors for some people. The elevator guys are on the way again and if we don't have any medical emergencies then it'll be okay. I try to look on the bright side and go get my coffee to start the day and start explaining to the people who have begun to call that the repair technicians are on the way. I'm just back from my coffee and getting comfortable when at 8:45 am, I get an alarm on the fire panel about a ground fault in the system, which can only lead to trouble. I talk to the monitoring company and then at 9 am call the management office to let them know about it and that we will need the fire system company to come and check it. At ten after nine, three elevator guys show up walking together up the drive like some low budget CSI shot. I could have laughed if I hadn't been so relieved. I sign them in and send them up to the elevator room. Remember now, at this point of my morning I'm in mop-up mode - I'm trying to juggle contractors working on the 10th floor, give authorized visitors access to the towers, remember which keys go to what doors and which ones I can sign out to what people, apologizing to residents for the elevators being out and the mail being five hours late yesterday (no, I'm not sure how these things are my fault, but they are), I've got contractors on the roof and contractors steam cleaning the compactor rooms and basically I'm being run ragged fielding increasingly bitchy phone calls about the recurring problems with the elevators in Tower Two. But, I have my coffee, I'm all right.
Think this is bad? I haven't even got to the "You gotta be kidding me" moment, but one disaster at a time.
The elevator guys leave at 10:30 am, with the passenger elevator running and the freight (the ambulance elevator remember) out until further notice because they have to order parts - which is the same old same old in regards to that elevator. I nod, take mental notes and switch my story from "sorry, they're out but the techs are here working" to "sorry, one is running and the parts have been ordered for the other one". I try and get on with the say, listening to the complaints about the mail and the H1N1 flu clinic debacle where I live and just sympathizing with people who have no other outlet. I'm just planning lunch at noon when the contractors from the roof come down and tell me the elevator is stuck on the tenth floor with the doors opening and closing but not moving. Naturally it happens at noon since the property management office is closed for lunch. I call the emergency cell number for them and get the one on the end of the line to call the elevator guys back to get my residents who can't climb stairs up to their homes (condos, not apartments or senior care hom, just adult living condos) and as I hang up the phone I sigh, trying to ready myself for more bitching. It's 12:18 pm.
At 12:22 pm, the fire alarms go off.
My first thought... "You gotta fucking be kidding me!"
But, I don't even think about it, I leap into action as first responder, lock up the office, and run down to meet the fire trucks. Every resident starts calling and I do what I was trained to - hang up on them and wait for a call from the monitoring company. I get down and the steam cleaner meets me at the base of Tower Two. They set off the bells with too much steam in the compactor room. I groan inwardly, I should have known. Moisture tends to get into fire alarm systems and short them out, causing false alarms. I used to see it when I worked in office towers and I should have called the monitoring company after the night guy left to make sure he had put the building into offline mode. I'd even seen the ground fault alarm before and was told it was the moisture but at 8:45 am, it slipped my mind. The moisture from the compactor steam cleaning got into the fire control room two doors down and caused the fault, setting up the perfect storm in which I am now standing. At that moment, I wanted to kill me a few architects (note to any architects out there - NEVER put the fire control room anywhere near anything that needs to be cleaned with steam or any kind of moisture period because you are just setting up your building for failure). Nothing to be done now for it but to ride the disaster day wave.
The monitoring company calls and I tell them I need Fire to attend and reset the alarm and to put the system offline for fire and trouble until 4 pm. Then I wait until the trucks arrive to show the firemen around, running back and forth under the towers to show them to the two fire rooms. I end up having to run back up two flights to the desk to reset the auxilliary panel because the system won't reset without it because of the ground fault I reported earlier. I get up there and the angry lesbian I have had run ins with is there demanding to know what is going on. I don't have time for her, even if she did get elected to the board, I need to get back to the Fire guys and let them know that I have reset the auxilliary panel. I brush her off and run back down the stairs It's a typical bizarre we live near the moutains weather day outside - windy, cold, sometimes snowy, sometimes raining and there are a bunch of residents milling around in the lobby in confusion. I can't worry about that, I have to deal with the firemen. The panels reset at last and silence the bells and with a sigh of relief, I head back to the desk.
Things should be normal now right? Right? Not exactly... I still have no elevator repair guys, a bunch of partially mobile residents stranded in the lobby with their walkers, an angry board member calling for my throat, I need a smoke, I need to piss and I'm about to blow and lose the cool I have managed to hang onto so far. The board member is at the desk and snarling (I think it's her default setting) and I just can't deal with her. All I can think about is the bottle of water I have in the back of the office. I ask her to please wait and go get that bottle of water. She leaves in a huff before I get back out to the desk. I explain what happened to the residents that are left after a half bottle of water and check the elevators in Tower one, which praise the Lord and pass the ammunition, are still working. It's only 12:45 pm and the property management company is still on lunch. There is no emergency at this point, so I sit down to type my reports and answer phone calls to explain about the fire bells.
By one pm when I call the company, my job has shifted again into administrator mode. The property manager calls me back fifteen minutes later and I explain about the elevators and the false alarm and what I know about it. I ask her to send the fire system maintenance company to look into the ground fault and explain the system is in manual mode. I explain repeatedly to people about the alarm... and then they start with the mail being late... and the elevators being down... and the noise from the roof earlier where contractors are working. I briefly consider writing my resignation but I instead get them calm and get me calm, laughing with them and telling them its a two finger day. (They all know I like fine Scotch and on the tough days, someone always asks me how many fingers the day is worth.) I apologize to those I had to hang up on during the emergency even though they were told in the last newsletter that in an emergency situation I can't answer the phone. I help the woman who rented the party room set up the party room, accept parcels for those who are not at home, and apologize to the board member. She apologizes to me and says "I just wanted to help". I think you're not trained for this, I've done nothing but train for these sorts of situations for seven years... all the help I need from you is that you stay outta the way. Outwardly, I smile and we chit chat and I get all my notifications done, steal five minutes to myself for a smoke and wait for my relief.
When he finally arrives, I have to repeat my day three times for him to get it all, all the while telling people the mail is here now, the elevator is working again, answering the phone, calling people to let them know the elevator is working again, and resisting the urge to just curl up in a ball and have a nap. I leave work fifteen minutes late (as usual but I never get paid for it) and on the way home, I put gas in the car, curse at the traffic, stop for ingredients for supper and just drive small errands until I am calmed down. At home I start the laundry, vacuumed, cleaned kitty litter in the landlady's place (a whole other set of issues), started another load of laundry, sat on the couch to watch the news... and promptly died for two hours. I was found by my Logan snoring merrily on the sofa and covered up and left alone until I wake up on my own.
My day went to hell in a handbasket but as one of the residents pointed out me, at least it all happened on one day and you don't have to worry for a while. I don't believe that because as a security guard, my day can go to hell at any given time because I'm always dealing with people who are angry at the world and I just happen to be a safe target. I can't arrest them, I just have to take their shit with a smile. I'm riding as a passenger in someone else's systems, watching over them and letting other people know when they go wrong and how to fix them, but since I'm JUST a security guard, no one ever listens to me.
I did realize as I was recounting this story to my friend that I had a pretty good day really. I kept my cool, didn't piss anyone off too much and here I am alive to tell the tale. It was just another fucked up day in paradise for me and yet, it was also another day above ground, so I guess it's all good. Even though it was chaos while it was happening, I knew it was all manageable and I knew that because I know how to do my job. I might not have liked dealing with the shit on my plate, but I did it and that's what I want people to know about security professionals.
Some of us do care and we deal with being pulled in all directions at once, so please, the next time you see a guy (or gal) sitting at a desk in a quasi-official uniform, don't just assume they're two feet and a heartbeat.
As for the day... well, Bette David said "You know what nostalgia is, don't you? It's basically a matter of recalling the fun without reliving the pain." I really hope today becomes nostalgic fast because it was one wild ride.
This is the story of what a security professional goes through on a bad day.
Okay, let's hit a long story sideways on with the beginning - as a note, I've modified this story from the conversation I had with a friend about my day. I woke up at the time I ought to have been arriving at work, which is never a good way to start a day. I was dressing before I was awake and calling work that I was going to be late. I should have stayed in bed as we will see but I arrived at work only 15 minutes late. Life is not great because I hate being late (it's disrespectful to your co-workers in security since they then have to stay late for briefing) but the night guy and I joked a bit and all was good. He briefs me and the elevators in Tower Two are both down. We have two elevators for each tower, and only one of each goes to the ground floor which is the ambulance entrance in a luxury condo building that has 80+ units that are 75% owned seniors. Having both elevators down is a nightmare because if anyone has a medical emergency, we are pooched before we start because we can't get the ambulance to them quickly. He had called the management company emergency number and the elevator company had arrived at 3 am but had to leave at 5 am for an entrapment in another building.
So there I am, stuck with what is turning out to be a hell day and it's only 7:15 am. The only way out of Tower Two is down the stairs, ten floors for some people. The elevator guys are on the way again and if we don't have any medical emergencies then it'll be okay. I try to look on the bright side and go get my coffee to start the day and start explaining to the people who have begun to call that the repair technicians are on the way. I'm just back from my coffee and getting comfortable when at 8:45 am, I get an alarm on the fire panel about a ground fault in the system, which can only lead to trouble. I talk to the monitoring company and then at 9 am call the management office to let them know about it and that we will need the fire system company to come and check it. At ten after nine, three elevator guys show up walking together up the drive like some low budget CSI shot. I could have laughed if I hadn't been so relieved. I sign them in and send them up to the elevator room. Remember now, at this point of my morning I'm in mop-up mode - I'm trying to juggle contractors working on the 10th floor, give authorized visitors access to the towers, remember which keys go to what doors and which ones I can sign out to what people, apologizing to residents for the elevators being out and the mail being five hours late yesterday (no, I'm not sure how these things are my fault, but they are), I've got contractors on the roof and contractors steam cleaning the compactor rooms and basically I'm being run ragged fielding increasingly bitchy phone calls about the recurring problems with the elevators in Tower Two. But, I have my coffee, I'm all right.
Think this is bad? I haven't even got to the "You gotta be kidding me" moment, but one disaster at a time.
The elevator guys leave at 10:30 am, with the passenger elevator running and the freight (the ambulance elevator remember) out until further notice because they have to order parts - which is the same old same old in regards to that elevator. I nod, take mental notes and switch my story from "sorry, they're out but the techs are here working" to "sorry, one is running and the parts have been ordered for the other one". I try and get on with the say, listening to the complaints about the mail and the H1N1 flu clinic debacle where I live and just sympathizing with people who have no other outlet. I'm just planning lunch at noon when the contractors from the roof come down and tell me the elevator is stuck on the tenth floor with the doors opening and closing but not moving. Naturally it happens at noon since the property management office is closed for lunch. I call the emergency cell number for them and get the one on the end of the line to call the elevator guys back to get my residents who can't climb stairs up to their homes (condos, not apartments or senior care hom, just adult living condos) and as I hang up the phone I sigh, trying to ready myself for more bitching. It's 12:18 pm.
At 12:22 pm, the fire alarms go off.
My first thought... "You gotta fucking be kidding me!"
But, I don't even think about it, I leap into action as first responder, lock up the office, and run down to meet the fire trucks. Every resident starts calling and I do what I was trained to - hang up on them and wait for a call from the monitoring company. I get down and the steam cleaner meets me at the base of Tower Two. They set off the bells with too much steam in the compactor room. I groan inwardly, I should have known. Moisture tends to get into fire alarm systems and short them out, causing false alarms. I used to see it when I worked in office towers and I should have called the monitoring company after the night guy left to make sure he had put the building into offline mode. I'd even seen the ground fault alarm before and was told it was the moisture but at 8:45 am, it slipped my mind. The moisture from the compactor steam cleaning got into the fire control room two doors down and caused the fault, setting up the perfect storm in which I am now standing. At that moment, I wanted to kill me a few architects (note to any architects out there - NEVER put the fire control room anywhere near anything that needs to be cleaned with steam or any kind of moisture period because you are just setting up your building for failure). Nothing to be done now for it but to ride the disaster day wave.
The monitoring company calls and I tell them I need Fire to attend and reset the alarm and to put the system offline for fire and trouble until 4 pm. Then I wait until the trucks arrive to show the firemen around, running back and forth under the towers to show them to the two fire rooms. I end up having to run back up two flights to the desk to reset the auxilliary panel because the system won't reset without it because of the ground fault I reported earlier. I get up there and the angry lesbian I have had run ins with is there demanding to know what is going on. I don't have time for her, even if she did get elected to the board, I need to get back to the Fire guys and let them know that I have reset the auxilliary panel. I brush her off and run back down the stairs It's a typical bizarre we live near the moutains weather day outside - windy, cold, sometimes snowy, sometimes raining and there are a bunch of residents milling around in the lobby in confusion. I can't worry about that, I have to deal with the firemen. The panels reset at last and silence the bells and with a sigh of relief, I head back to the desk.
Things should be normal now right? Right? Not exactly... I still have no elevator repair guys, a bunch of partially mobile residents stranded in the lobby with their walkers, an angry board member calling for my throat, I need a smoke, I need to piss and I'm about to blow and lose the cool I have managed to hang onto so far. The board member is at the desk and snarling (I think it's her default setting) and I just can't deal with her. All I can think about is the bottle of water I have in the back of the office. I ask her to please wait and go get that bottle of water. She leaves in a huff before I get back out to the desk. I explain what happened to the residents that are left after a half bottle of water and check the elevators in Tower one, which praise the Lord and pass the ammunition, are still working. It's only 12:45 pm and the property management company is still on lunch. There is no emergency at this point, so I sit down to type my reports and answer phone calls to explain about the fire bells.
By one pm when I call the company, my job has shifted again into administrator mode. The property manager calls me back fifteen minutes later and I explain about the elevators and the false alarm and what I know about it. I ask her to send the fire system maintenance company to look into the ground fault and explain the system is in manual mode. I explain repeatedly to people about the alarm... and then they start with the mail being late... and the elevators being down... and the noise from the roof earlier where contractors are working. I briefly consider writing my resignation but I instead get them calm and get me calm, laughing with them and telling them its a two finger day. (They all know I like fine Scotch and on the tough days, someone always asks me how many fingers the day is worth.) I apologize to those I had to hang up on during the emergency even though they were told in the last newsletter that in an emergency situation I can't answer the phone. I help the woman who rented the party room set up the party room, accept parcels for those who are not at home, and apologize to the board member. She apologizes to me and says "I just wanted to help". I think you're not trained for this, I've done nothing but train for these sorts of situations for seven years... all the help I need from you is that you stay outta the way. Outwardly, I smile and we chit chat and I get all my notifications done, steal five minutes to myself for a smoke and wait for my relief.
When he finally arrives, I have to repeat my day three times for him to get it all, all the while telling people the mail is here now, the elevator is working again, answering the phone, calling people to let them know the elevator is working again, and resisting the urge to just curl up in a ball and have a nap. I leave work fifteen minutes late (as usual but I never get paid for it) and on the way home, I put gas in the car, curse at the traffic, stop for ingredients for supper and just drive small errands until I am calmed down. At home I start the laundry, vacuumed, cleaned kitty litter in the landlady's place (a whole other set of issues), started another load of laundry, sat on the couch to watch the news... and promptly died for two hours. I was found by my Logan snoring merrily on the sofa and covered up and left alone until I wake up on my own.
My day went to hell in a handbasket but as one of the residents pointed out me, at least it all happened on one day and you don't have to worry for a while. I don't believe that because as a security guard, my day can go to hell at any given time because I'm always dealing with people who are angry at the world and I just happen to be a safe target. I can't arrest them, I just have to take their shit with a smile. I'm riding as a passenger in someone else's systems, watching over them and letting other people know when they go wrong and how to fix them, but since I'm JUST a security guard, no one ever listens to me.
I did realize as I was recounting this story to my friend that I had a pretty good day really. I kept my cool, didn't piss anyone off too much and here I am alive to tell the tale. It was just another fucked up day in paradise for me and yet, it was also another day above ground, so I guess it's all good. Even though it was chaos while it was happening, I knew it was all manageable and I knew that because I know how to do my job. I might not have liked dealing with the shit on my plate, but I did it and that's what I want people to know about security professionals.
Some of us do care and we deal with being pulled in all directions at once, so please, the next time you see a guy (or gal) sitting at a desk in a quasi-official uniform, don't just assume they're two feet and a heartbeat.
As for the day... well, Bette David said "You know what nostalgia is, don't you? It's basically a matter of recalling the fun without reliving the pain." I really hope today becomes nostalgic fast because it was one wild ride.
